THE LAST VOYAGE OF THE DEMETER (2023) - DRIPPING WITH GOTHIC HORROR BUT THE TAP IS DRY ON SCARES AND ACTION

 
The long anticipated Last Voyage Of The Demeter, based on a single chapter from the original Stoker novel, has all the ingredients to make a horror classic. It is beautifully shot, should literally be nominated for it's production design but fails to deliver the full goods in scares. It's too slow moving, the characters are hard to relate to. 

Having said that, this doomed voyage carrying 50 crates in a tumultuous journey from Transylvania to London is an important and oft overlooked chapter in the original book, the film is faithful to the original source material. The production design is gorgeous, the whole movie oozes goth. And the special effects are admirable as well. 

If it had more scares and was faster moving, it may have hit the mark. But ultimately, Last Voyage (which spent over two decades in development hell and bombed big time at the box office) is, at best, a serviceable horror flick.  2.5 stars/5

When the trailer is more exciting than the movie, you know you got a problem.

READY FOR THE HOLIDAYS, B-MOVIE FANS? - HERE'S A PLAYLIST OF 26 CHRISTMAS RELATED B-FLICK TRAILERS TO GET YOU IN THE MOOD

 

Happy Horrific Holidays to you, movie fans and thank you all for visiting the blog! 

I found this playlist I put together a few years ago and it has some rockin' b-movie trailers, all pertaining to Christmas or Santa Claus. 

Enjoy, and thanks again for stopping by! TR

"CHRISTMAS HORROR TRAILER PARK" PLAYLIST

FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S (2023) - I GO AGAINST THE GRAIN AND CALL THIS A FUN, ENJOYABLE HORROR ROMP, WAY BETTER THAN WILLY'S WONDERLAND

 

Fate played a little hand in my discovering this film because I did not know it was based on a video game and had I known likely would not have checked it out. I'm really glad I did, I find this a fun and effective mix of horror, comedy and animatronics. 

Josh Hutcherson plays a troubled security guard who takes a job at an abandoned family entertainment center where four animatronic mascots who are prone to murder reside. Guess when they like to come out? That's right, at night. 

Character actor Matthew Lillard plays the career counselor that sets him up with this gig and he's excellent, raising the overall bar of the film to a higher level. The creatures are not hokey at all, certainly not like Willy's Wonderland. The acting by the main leads is top notch, music is great and it's finely directed with all the right suspense and pacing. 

Not sure what the critics were all griping about on this one, I say thumbs up for Five Nights At Freddy's. The public certainly liked it as it was a financial success and a sequel is already in the works. 

As of this post, Freddy's is only available on Peacock.  3.25 stars/5

REPOST WEEK! - AL PACINO IS A DRUGGED-OUT PUBLICITY AGENT AND RYAN O NEAL IS HIS BEST CLIENT TRYING TO HIDE A SECRET IN "PEOPLE I KNOW" (2002)

 

A burned out publicity agent (Pacino) also a druggie and alcoholic, he's trying to get out of the racket but can only keep hustling to keep things afloat. His best client, an actor who is trying to break into politics (Ryan O Neal) asks him to pick up an actress (Tea Leoni in an instant favorite role) at the police station for him. They decide to go out and party all night where in a hotel room he passes out right as he sees her raped and murdered. The next day, preparing for a big event that's supposed to jump start his career back, a series of events take place where he begins to realize what he may have witnessed the previous night but also that his life is in danger. 

When you look up the term mixed reviews, it says see this movie. It surely could have used another run through development and suffers from continuity and character development problems. Yet somehow it pulls you in, has a bit of a hypnotic effect very much like the drugs it's character's take. That's reliant however on you rolling with the main characters from the get-go. The film also had the unfortunate luck of being held back a year due to 9/11. There were scenes that had the buildings in the background, subsequently removed. 

Music by Spike Lee regular Terrance Blanchard gets a little overlooked in the mess as does Kim Basinger and Bill Nunn in key roles. Ryan O Neal didn't do a lot of features as time went on and it's nice to see him here as his charismatic and dapper self. He brings to this film very much what he did to Zero Effect four years prior. Tea Leoni is a total firecracker and her scenes bring what little electricity comes to this misfire before her character is killed off. 

An indie that not surprisingly bombed at the box office. A mess for sure, but one that's somehow interesting to watch. Currently available VOD on Amazon or Vudu. Good one to throw on late at night. 3.0 stars/5

REPOST WEEK! - THEY LIVE IN AN ABANDONED SILVER MINE, THEY'VE BEEN DOWN THERE FOR 100 YEARS, NOW SOMEONE HAS AWAKENED "THE BOOGENS" (1981) - RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

 

File this one under "critters" type movies a la CHUD, Gremlins, The Pit and so on. Two college aged couples rent a house while the boys of the group are working down in an old silver mine. By going down into the mine they awaken the Boogens who've been asleep for a hundred years and planned on sleeping in. Why then are there people disappearing from the house? 

A Boogen, in case you're wondering, is a scaly monster somewhat resembling a large turtle, ugly as f*ck, with lots of nasty sharp teeth. And that's all I need to know to have me running in the other direction. 

This is a great eighties horror classic, some would call a VHS classic since it did real well in that format. The cast is a perfect collection of eighties faces as well. A little cheesy comedy here and there, some appealing eye candy, just the right amount of everything to round out a bona fide eighties horror classic, a must-see for B-movie fans.  2.75 stars/2.75

A Boogen, run for your lives!

REPOST WEEK! - MEANWHILE BACK IN MALIBU, WE'RE GOING "DOWN THE P.C.H." (2006) - SUPER LOW BUDGET INDIE BY SEAN MICHAEL BEYER THAT PACKS A SERIOUS PUNCH

 

It's a familiar storyline - guy gets out of prison, tries to start a clean life, someone tries to thwart it. In this case it's his younger brother who has fallen in with the wrong Malibu crowd. Which is one of the cool things about this flick, there's lots of movies about Malibu but few about the troubled youth drug underworld. Beyer makes his script work with a colorful array of characters so we don't get bogged down in gangster land. 

The ensemble cast rocks, several recognizable faces and always great to see Lin Shaye. And to think this was made for less than fifty thousand dollars just shows what a whole lot of passion can accomplish. I first found out about this movie a good ten years ago from one of our featured blogs, Rupert Pupkin Speaks. And in fact through the years I've discovered scores of great movies just from his site, check it out.

Only available on DVD, best bet is Amazon, used copies go about seven dollars.  2.75 stars/2.75

REPOST WEEK! - JEFF FAHEY AND BRENT BRISCOE ARE MINERS TRAPPED 600 FEET "BENEATH" (2013) THE SURFACE - NO TIME, OXYGEN'S RUNNING OUT, HALLUCINATIONS, AND THEY'RE TURNING ON EACH OTHER!

 

Brent Briscoe's second-to-last feature finds him teaming up with Jeff Fahey as a couple of veteran miners leading a group of younger miners. A woman who is only supposed to be along for that day starts to hallucinate as their peril of being trapped slowly worsens and their oxygen runs out. Are her comrades really turning on her and each other or is it really the ghosts of another mining accident years before?

Production design is excellent and the film does have some good scares once it gets going. Fahey and Briscoe are totally in their element here but they are better than the material they have to work with, A strong lack of character development and past history, we want to care for these folks and their dilemma but know very little about them. 

To add to the film's drawbacks there were two other movies released in the years 2013 and 2014 with the same exact title and this film is listed as both so if you're going to check it out make sure it's the "Beneath" about the miners.  2.5 stars/5

REPOST WEEK! - JON GRIES & GARRETT MORRIS ARE HEADED FOR A "JACKPOT" (2001) - HOWEVER, THEY IS NOT GAMBLING, THEY ARE SINGING IN KARAOKE CONTESTS!

"If you like Pina Coladas....and getting caught in the rain.."

Sing it, Jon!

"Candy" scene

Sonny Holiday (Jon Gries) is a dreamer. He wants to be a karaoke star but he's really a legend in his own mind. He chucks his wife and kid to go on the road with Lester Irving (Garrett Morris) who is supposed to be Sonny's manager but he's got his own delusions going. They travel from town to town living a meager existence and running into various characters, making this one part road movie as well. 

Gries really digs deep into his part and has an appealing voice in the music scenes. Morris has a lot of lines in this one and it's nice to see him stretch out in a combo comedic and dramatic role. The late, great Mac Davis has a short but enjoyable cameo and the film's highest marks come in it's editing which is indie perfect. The Polish Brothers are the duo behind this one and you know how we love lifting up overlooked films on this blog. This one's a dandy! 3.0 stars/5 Only available on DVD. 

Jackpot

Theatrical Trailer from Sony Pictures Classics